by jb | Sep 10, 2013 | Horoscopes
Just when you thought the economy had begun to rebound from the Great Meltdown of 2008, my assets were totally frozen this week. Plus, my sure-fire bid to become a millionaire fell through when those jerk-knobs at the lottery stiffed me. Again. Are better economic...
by jb | Sep 10, 2013 | Horoscopes
Memo: U.S. Department of Homeland Security The secretary of the Department of Homeland Security, in consultation with the nation’s top astrological experts, today issued the following Risk Assessment Horoscope: ARIES (March 21-April 19) Use common sense when...
by jb | Sep 10, 2013 | Horoscopes
ARIES (March 21-April 19) Paying more than $700 for a lollipop could be financially unsound. Opt for a mundane evening at home over a three-state crime spree. Avoid fire. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) Using words may help you communicate your thoughts. Reconsider plans to...
by jb | Sep 10, 2013 | Horoscopes
Gangsta horoscope ARIES (March 21-April 19) Consult members of your posse before making an important decision. Don’t let no fool jam you up. Drink several 40s at dusk to relieve tension. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) Your beeper brings news of lucrative business...
by jb | Sep 1, 2013 | Life
OK, everybody. Summer’s over. Back to school. That’s it. Single file. No pushing. Get rid of that gum. What’s that, Johnny? Do you have something you want to share with the class? Let’s pay attention now. My name is Mr. Breneman … …...
